


she’s got me feeling undone

by callieincali



Category: The Magicians (TV)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, F/F, but then more angst, but theres a fluffy memory, read this if you like unedited fics written in exactly 3 hours, wickoff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 14:55:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12368139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/callieincali/pseuds/callieincali
Summary: it’s just a necklace, but to julia it’s so much more than that





	she’s got me feeling undone

**Author's Note:**

> my wickoff heart has been revived once again and it has brought a drabble fic with it. i’ve been practicing a lot with dialogue recently bc it’s never been my strong suit so basically this is my attempt at writing a lot of it. 
> 
> uh idk if this is how the necklaces truly work and i know usually there’s a mirror involved but guess what? there’s not one this time! and considering this is the first wickoff fic to surface since august, you should all be kind enough to overlook that tiny detail. 
> 
> thanks in advance

The jewelry box on Julia’s nightstand begged for her attention as if her subconscious knew the container held the item on her mind.

An item that every part of her seemed to reject the idea of seeing. But an item that held far too much of pull for Julia to ignore the craving of her fingers longing to hold it.

So, of course, she unclipped the latch on the front of the wooden box against all moral warnings, and reached inside, retracting her hand as soon as the gold chain in question was entangled in her grasp.

Immediately, Julia brought the necklace to her chest, smothering the half-heart charm between her thumb and forefinger, yearning for the gentle heat that would have once resonated from it.

_The necklace around Julia’s neck itched under her shirt, the cool metal captivating her thoughts as she stared at the vague outline of her ceiling in the dim lighting._

_Her clock surely read a time far past midnight, but her eyes refused to stay shut, resulting in a seemingly endless inability to sleep._

_Mindlessly, her fingers found their way to the charm resting on her chest, her thumb sliding over the engraving that remained incomplete without its other half. A small smile tugged at her lips when a familiar warmth met her touch, clouding her thoughts with a calming sensation that overpowered the intimidating images filling her head._

_But just as quickly as the relaxation washed over her, it dissipated in an instant when a questioning voice reverberated through her ears._

_“Julia?”_

_She dropped the charm from her grasp instinctively, her cheeks flushing red at the realization of what she had done. Magic radiated from the necklace, lingering as a vague vibration against her skin that alerted Julia to the fact that the jewelry was no longer dormant._

_“Oh, hey, I— didn’t mean to do that,” she replied, flustered by the sudden sound of Kady’s voice (even if part of her had been hoping to hear it). A quiet chuckle came from the other end of the magic charm— a chuckle that sent Julia’s muscles back to their previous relaxed position._

_“Why are you up so late?” Kady’s voice was low and raspy, but not groggy enough for Julia to believe that the girl had been sleeping._

_“I could ask you the same.”_

_Another short laugh. Another flutter in Julia’s stomach._

_“Who’s to say your necklace-call didn’t wake me up?” Kady shot back, her tone relaying nothing but playfulness. Julia felt the beginnings of her face starting to redden at the question, a twinge of guilt building in her stomach._

_“Did it?” Her fingers were back on the necklace, tracing down the chain as she asked._

_“No, I was already awake,” Kady sighed as she spoke, her response prompting Julia to let out a breath of her own._

_“So?” The shorter girl dragged out the syllable, unable to hold back the smirk that formed on her lips as she referred to their earlier question._

_“Hey, I asked you first.” Julia could practically hear the similar smile that was probably plastered to Kady’s face._

_“I just have a lot on my mind, I guess.” A yawn swelled in her chest halfway through the answer, but Kady didn’t seem to have trouble understanding her through the exhaustion, wasting no time to follow-up with another inquiry._

_“Such as?”_

_The question was simple but Julia knew the answer was a stark contrast, and the reminder of the thoughts plaguing her sleep-deprived mind soured her stomach as a few choice images flashed across her vision. She forced a steadying sigh, hoping it would be enough to shake them from her head._

_“Flashbacks, killing Reynard, more flashbacks— the usual, really.” Her lighthearted tone was intended to keep Kady from beginning to pity her, but by the striking silence that followed, Julia figured her objective was not met. “Your turn,” she attempted, the desire to draw the attention from herself becoming a priority._

_And thankfully, Kady’s reply didn’t hold the sympathetic nuances that Julia had been trying to avoid._

_“Well, now my problems seem pretty stupid in comparison,” the older girl muttered, instantly drawing the smile back to Julia’s lips, as if she knew just what to say to bring humor back to the conversation._

_“Well, you’re still on the hook to tell me,” Julia countered, rubbing at her eyes as they finally began to grow tired. She hoped they would hold out for a bit longer._

_Kady groaned loudly on the other end, obviously fabricating her annoyance._

_“It’s dumb, I—“ she paused to clear her throat— an action used solely to buy herself time. “I’m trying to stop myself from taking a double dose.” It was meek and muttered but the context told Julia why it had been hard for the girl to confess it._

_“Would it help if I said ‘I believe in you’?” She tried, her voice raising in pitch as if she already knew the suggestion was pointless._

_“Nah, not really.”_

_“Didn’t think so.”_

_Silence stole the discussion for a considerable amount of time, but the quiet it left in its wake was a comfortable one that Julia wouldn’t have broken if it weren’t for the fact that she was on the verge of drifting off._

_“Is there anything that_ would _help?” Part of Julia selfishly wished Kady would say that the continuation of their conversation would keep her mind off of doubling up on magic methadone, but she pushed that desire down, filing it away as something to dwell on later._

 _“No, I— don’t worry about me. I should be asking if there’s anything I can do to help_ you _.” Kady dismissed the concerns, easily lacing her voice with a nonchalant facade that Julia almost envied._

 _“Well,_ are _you asking?” The smile grew wider on her face as Kady responded with a laugh that sent a wave of sparks through her chest._

_“Yes, Jules.”_

_Again, Julia could hear the grin on the other girl’s face and the way her eyes were almost certainly rolling in faux irritation._

_“You could come over?”_

_“Are_ you _asking?” Kady mocked, this time evoking a laugh from Julia._

_She found it strange that minutes ago, she had been consumed by the overwhelming memories that tormented her subconscious, but after one short conversation with Kady, the intrusive thoughts felt long forgotten._

_“Yes, Kady.”_

_“Then, I’ll be over in five.”_

She slung the necklace around her neck, reaching for a handheld mirror with the hopes it would reveal where the jewelry’s other half resided. But as she stared into the glass, all she found was her own face, cheeks sunken, eyes resting above dark bags that her smudged makeup only added intensity to.

Julia threw the mirror to her bed, removing the necklace with a sharp tug and returning it to the jewelry box it belonged in, her hands craving for a time when she could wrap her fingers around the half-heart and instantly feel comforted at the thought that she was not alone.

Now all it brought was a feeling of emptiness and what should have been.

**Author's Note:**

> you know i had to end it angsty.
> 
> but um i hope someone out there enjoyed this. and hopefully the next wickoff fic doesn’t take 2 months to make. 
> 
> gotta love hiatuses. 
> 
> okay that’s all. thanks for reading this mess


End file.
